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A Letter to My Younger Self: I Am Not the Woman You Expect

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Dear 17 -year-old self,

I am not the status of women you expect . I am not the ideal, successful career woman; the brilliant, beautiful, ambitious young professional to operate in a corporate bureau. I am a recent college alumnu; lost at sea, a sea of societal possibilities and pressing decisions about the future. Perhaps I am not the status of women you have dream I would be, but that does not negate the wealth of experiences that will mold you into the strong female you will become. Your most difficult know-hows and the lessons you will learn about life, adoration, and womanhood will lead to your greatest successes and divulge you to be far better resilient than you are familiar. I know that you are incredibly tenacious and that you will dig in your ends, refusing to listen to the life assignments I have to impart, but satisfy take them to heart, live by them, and grow by them.

You Are Worth More Than Your Body .

In third grade, “youve heard” the first of numerous questions about why youre so thin, and it stung. Since then, it has seemed to you that beings relentlessly comment on your appearance. You feel pressure to have the clearest skin, to not be so towering and gangly, and to amble gracefully wherever you go. You wish you could diminish into the crowd and become inconspicuous in a sea of people who look perfectly beautiful to you. I will be honest with you: You will not grow up to have clear skin, flawless makeup abilities, or perfect teeth, but nothing of those idiosyncrasies substance. You are style, caring, and magnanimous, and your nerve will carry you further in life than you believe. On your twenty-first birthday, a stranger will confront you and weeping your appearance apart. You will not care in the slightest . Those words will sting, but you will recognize hurting and strife in someone “youve never” met and will feel deep rapport. You will realize that societys prevalent moans that beauty defines womanhood and that kindness, empathy and love are worthless are a merely thought. I am not the woman you expect . I strive to demonstrate my femininity through my character alone, through my mettle, and I will succeed in that pursuit.

The Pursuit of Academic Success is Not the Pursuit of Happiness .

You are a perfectionist, and you are likely cringing internally at the idea that success and prosperity are not interwoven. In college, you will believe that the ultimate marker of success, the crown jewel of your college know, is graduating Summa Cum Laude in merely three years. In the process of pursuing your goal, you will endure stress that will shake you to the core. The anxiety you will feel over your points will devour you for years, pull you away from friends and family, and stimulate you to feel dejected and worthless. You will question the importance of ensuring that tiers as a measure of success and started to prioritize health and recreation. You will graduate Summa Cum Laude after weathering deep conflict, in the exact timeframe you planned, but the pleasure of graduating with highest honors will fade after a mere second, as you realize that you sacrificed the most important parts of life to reaching your goal. I am not the woman you expect . I understand that success is living life to the fullest, and self-worth should stem from strength of character alone , not from the the indicators of success that civilization prizes.

Cherish Every Moment You Have.

At age nineteen, you will know-how loss for the first time. You will be away at college when you sounds the news, unsure of how to cope away from your familys caring forearms. You will feel wholly alone until you realize that mourning alongside your loved ones will heal you. You will come to learn that cherishing life is not greedy; on the contrary, it is how your lost loved one wishing to you to live. Living and adoration are more revered the ways and means of honoring life.

Nearly three months after your college graduation, you will receive word of another loss. You will be taken aback, stuck in a tailspin. You will need to re-learn how to cope. Your brain will flash back to your college graduation, the last hour you spent with the person you lost. The remembrance will leave you with a bitter preference in your opening and a sharp-worded, overwhelming pain in your center until you realize that you induced the most of that special hour and that the one you lost was happy and honored to share in your milestone. You will feel lighter and happier as you realize that you savored the day and will cherish that time forever. I am not the woman you expect . I have coped with loss and learned that healing branches from appreciating life, even in lifes darkest moments.

Vulnerability is Something to Embrace .

You are staring down at a blank Word document, frozen, unable to write. You have no desire to share your objections with the colleges to which you are applying. You refuse to open up to others, scared of feeling hurt by them. Your greatest dread is losing the acceptance of others by exposing your perceived weaknesses.

At twenty years old, you will receive an opportunity to share your tale through writing and it will change their own lives forever. You will realize that the gentle mutter of your pen across paper frees you, that writing strengthens the connection between yourself and the world. You will discover that your words have the power to draw others closer to you and that your pen has the power to ignite change, spawned hope and encouraging acceptance. You will embrace your darkest fondness and fears, transforming them into a thing of attractivenes. Most importantly, you will find a burning joy and a sense of purpose through compose; all because you chose to is not merely give others look through the window of your worldview, but to open the door to your life. I am not the woman you expect . I have forged a deep communication not only with myself, but with others, through learning my affection, altering my strivings into beauty, and embracing my past, present, and future wholeheartedly.

I am not the status of women you expect . I do not base my self-worth on my posture in life, but instead, my reference and my own personal increment. I am not the status of women you expect . I have not only knowledge merriment, but too snaps to become the status of women I am today. I am not the woman you expect . I am here to assure you that due to the challenges you will face and the lessons you will learn, you will become a lot stronger, wiser and more resilient than you could have ever imagined.

Love,

Your older, wiser self

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